I used to think leadership anxiety was just part of the deal. You know, like back-to-back meetings or pretending to understand Excel formulas. But then I learned something that changed everything:
Your brain has two anxiety systems, and neither of them care about your to-do list.
Fast Anxiety (Amygdala): Instant fear response. This is why you jump when you hear a loud noise or feel your stomach drop when you see a Slack message that just says, "Hey."
Slow Anxiety (Cortex): Overthinking and worrying about the future. This is why you lie awake at 2 AM crafting the perfect email response that no one is going to read that closely.
Anxiety isn’t just random panic—it’s actually your brain trying to protect you. The problem? Sometimes it overreacts. Your brain sees avoidance as proof that something is dangerous. The more you avoid something, the scarier it becomes until it feels like a life-threatening event. (Yes, even answering emails.)
The Leadership Anxiety Loop
If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in an endless cycle of overthinking, welcome to the club. Anxiety loves the "what-if" game:
"What if I fail?"
"What if everyone secretly thinks I have no idea what I’m doing?"
"What if I make a bad decision and ruin everything?"
Here’s what’s wild: 90% of what you worry about never happens. And that remaining 10%? You’ll handle it, just like you always do.
Breaking the Anxiety Cycle (Without Quitting Your Job to Live in the Woods)
Most leaders try to "manage" anxiety by ignoring it. But that’s like trying to stop a toddler’s tantrum by pretending they’re not screaming in the grocery store. It only gets louder.
Instead, try this:
Baby Steps: If social situations make you anxious, don’t sign up for a networking event with 300 strangers. Start by making small talk with the barista. If starting a big project feels overwhelming, break it into the smallest possible first step—just open the document.
Reframe the What-Ifs: Instead of "What if I fail?" ask, "What’s actually happening right now?" Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) teaches that reality is rarely as terrifying as our anxious predictions.
Get Moving: Anxiety feeds on stillness. Go for a walk, lift something heavy, do five jumping jacks in your office (or at least think about doing them). Movement tells your brain, "Hey, we’re safe. You can calm down now."
Breathe Like a Navy SEAL: When anxiety hits, your breath speeds up. Slow it down with this: Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, exhale for 8 seconds. Repeat five times. This activates your parasympathetic nervous system—the part of your body that tells you you’re not, in fact, about to be eaten by a tiger.
Sleep Like Your Sanity Depends On It (Because It Does): Bad sleep makes anxiety worse. A restless brain is a more anxious brain. Get off screens an hour before bed, set a bedtime like you’re a responsible adult, and stop scrolling WebMD at 11 PM.
You Are Not an "Anxious Person"
This one is important. You are not an anxious person. You are a person who experiences anxiety. And people can change.
If you’re tired of feeling stuck in stress and overthinking, the first step is seeing the bigger picture. That’s exactly why I created The Total Package Playbook—a free tool designed to help you figure out where you’re thriving, where you’re stuck, and how to start leading with clarity instead of stress.
You don’t have to stay trapped in the anxiety loop.
Small shifts lead to big breakthroughs. Ready to take the first step?
Comments